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Kenyan women living and working in the US have opened up on why most love relationships with Kenyan men are not working.
A majority of women interviewed by the Nairobian laid the blame on Kenyan men for the current state of affairs.
Sarah Mwangi, who works as an auditor in the US, says Kenyan men are brilliant but lack what she termed as ambition.
“They lack the drive and their presentation is so poor. Some will still don those ‘Mwalimu Jini’ shoes, yet they are in the United States,” she said.
Chero Leitich, who hails from Nakuru, vowed never to date a Kenyan man again and is currently seeing someone of a different race and nationality. She broke up with her Kenyan boyfriend due to “demands of the environment” and thinks the relationship would have worked in Kenya.
“Even something as simple as a public display of affection, which women value so much, is almost impossible with Kenyan men,” she said.
Chero adds that Kenyan men dislike outspoken women, adding that they are not motivated, lack ambition, and are comfortable in circles where they only drink and have barbeques.
Rebecca Musau, a nurse based in Washington DC, agrees with Chero’s sentiments. She says: “It is true the single ladies find it hard to find men. I know some in their 40s with no men or kids in their lives. They have money but no man. It is not easy to get a white or American man. They are too busy just like everyone is in America. You may get one from online dating sites, which unfortunately has seen many women being scammed by con men.”
Given that white and African-American men are hardly available, many women have opted to stay single or become single mums. “I think Kenyan men are few compared to women here,” adds Rebecca.
Rebecca also feels that rights, freedom, and money are to blame for failed relationships between Kenyans in the US because women are not subjected to the directions of their men as is the case in Kenya.
“With such freedom, you can understand the runaway infidelity that has become the order of the day here,” says Rebecca.
She also thinks that women adapt easily to the American environment compared to men. “Even a woman from the remotest part of Kenya comes here and a few months later, she will be driving and earning $2,000 a month (Sh170,000), probably from babysitting. Do you think such a woman will care about or respect the husband?” she poses.
But Sonie Kendi, who moved to Indiana four months ago, says it boils down to individual preferences.
“Some Kenyan women cannot date Kenya men and vice-versa. Generally, most of my friends prefer American men, black or white, to Kenyans,” she says adding: “In my estimation, I think as East African women score highly amongst American men because our black American women counterparts are rowdy, uncouth, and not as ‘feminine’ as us, hence we attract their men.”
Rhoda Adera, a Missouri-based journalist, says the nature of life in America is the reason why Kenyan women cannot find suitors.
“It depends on the visa one is granted. Save for those who immigrate here on the Green Card, many Kenyans come here as students or visitors. Without proper documentation, you cannot work and without work, finding a stable relationship is nearly impossible,” she observes.
She adds that this is why many Kenyan men and women seek to marry Americans to find their path to citizenship. Rhoda adds that unlike women, Kenyan men find it hard to cope with the liberal culture in the US.
“Women navigate the culture shock faster than men. Unless you were brought up in a wealthy and liberal family back in Kenya where you share responsibilities with your sisters, the idea of a housewife in America is non-existent. The hours can be unforgiving and that complicates many relationships.”
She adds: “Views towards marriage are looked at from a cultural, financial and academic perspective. Before you settle with anyone, there must be a catch. But you notice younger women are not really interested in marriage anymore.”
Thank you @Papa. This article is very shallow/ artificial and full of stereotypes. That part about Black American women is downright rude. Where do our journalists go to school? More than 80% seem to have some allergy to critical thinking.
I absolutely agree! Stereotypes were very prevalent . The part about African American women was INSULTING! It galled me so much. How dare someone write that?
I agree with @Chero on this one "Kenyan men dislike outspoken women, adding that they are not motivated, lack ambition, and are comfortable in circles where they only drink and have barbeques." Before you start throwing stones not all Kenyan men in the US lack motivation, ambition and not all are comfortable in circles. We have some who are husband material, ambitious and have motivation but you have to really look for them they are too busy working, at school or they are already taken. Life ya majuu sio easy vile so Kila mtu akae lane yake. Watu wa Circle Sacco kando, watu wa families and ambitions Sacco kando. It's what it's hiyo tuu.
These Complainants are Tangatangas who Behave BADLY not very Long after their Spouses, Boyfriends, or etc welcome them Abroad. They're BENEVOLENCE abusers who should know Better; and Repent.
Weee wacha kuleta siasa mbichi. Leave tanga tanga alone. Not apart of them but wewe umekosea. It was individual opinions. Further more the part about nyama choma and beer is 80% true. Then Kenyan men have a habit of looking for Kenyan women who are RNs or make more money than them so that they can just slide on through! BAD HABIT!!
That part where one woman describes African American women as loud,uncouth,etc is just off. Common now. You enjoy the freedom and liberties that African Americans have fought and died for & still continue to fight for but you come in a boat from God knows where and disrespect them like that?? If it wasn't for their so called "loud mouth" you think you would exist in America?
Common Kenyans lets look at history and stop sounding ignorant en damn.
Tariq Rasheed should read this article.
This one of african americans paving the way for us is old and rugged. That loud, uncouth behaviour is so off-putting and has tarnished the name of blacks world over. Behave.
Then go back to your country! African Americans have literally died for Americans to accept giving Africans visas! If you don’t like their attitude go back where you came from this is their home so be respectful and learn their history!
"This one of african americans paving the way for us is old and rugged."
Be that as it may, does that change the truth in fact as you stated?
"That loud, uncouth behaviour is so off-putting and has tarnished the name of blacks world over."
Also learn common courtesy, it will take you far in this life. Since when did you arrogate to shade someone's ish when you are in their home? You are free to leave bud.
When you see shyte you don't care for you determine that ain't for ya, and stop there. It's not your fight, don't make it. Again you are free to leave. Be glad all you gotta do is take a flight back and not a wind sail.
That’s literally how you Hamites (so-called Africans) were able to come over here. If y’all are so great then why is Africa a dump? Hamite men can’t ahd haven’t built anything that’s great or memorable.
Hi Cindy! Which freedoms did you fight for and who came here in a boat - you or me? If I may ask? I paid for my damn flight ticket both ways, and still had money left over for a bottle of Bulls beer or Schlitz! Or that Corona beer!
And you know what Cindy, when I take that next flight back to the motherland, I will not look back! I will know exactly where I’m going and who to go see there! There is no place like home! We have freedoms there too!!
Stop gaslighting. Please show us where Cindy claimed to fight for any freedoms? A nd yes black women fought for freedoms you enjoy in US (if that is where you are); a simple Gsearch Ella Josephine Baker, Ida B. Wells-Barnett, Mary McLeod Bethune, Shirley Chisholm, Dorothy Irene Height, Biddy (Bridget) Mason, Sojourner Truth, and Harriet Tubman. Heck do you sit at the back of the bus? You can thank Rosa Parks. I didn't see Cindy claim freedoms are a west exclusivity. You sound exactly like the westerners and now easterners despised in Africa - they came to exploit and send those resources back to their country while looking down their nose at the locals. Grow up.
Just like everyone came to America individually and pursued different pathways to success, so goes with relationship. The environment doesn't change a good morally grounded person or morally empty person. Kenyan woman looks at American lifestyle as paradise, where they can work, have fun, f#$co anyone they want and the society class for them. We see them out here and wonder where is the compass of such women's womanhood? Soon they're on their own, hitting 40+. Too late the brothers moved on. There are those who focus on important aspects of life like education, work and family, with toned down behavioral characters to nurture and they're happy and successful all round. And there are those who have been brought to America by their boyfriends and husbands. Supported thru education and gets good jobs. Soon the man becomes unattractive because money is the sparkle to the woman in the relationship. Soon the man is out the door, despised and castigated like a devil by the woman, whether they have children or not. Am a victim of this scenario. Thank God I was left with my children to raise while she stormed out to enjoy "her money" as she calls it. Many Kenyan men in the U.S suffer this relationship predicament. Most Kenyans' social culture is as it has been even in Kenya. Men drink to socialize. The same culture is embraced by Kenyan men in the U.S. but not that they're drunkards, irresponsible to keep a relationship or raise family. That being said, Kenyan men in America work with the focus of developing back in Kenya and go back. But women aren't interested doing that. That's the big contention. I have been raising my 3 children as a single parent and father now they're in college. For these yrs I have been single dating Kenyan women in America, I have seen and experienced a scenario that is homogeneous.... "My money I keep, we use yours"...and even at 40, 50 or so yrs still single and wondering where good men are, these women are stuck in their own cocoon that has robbed them the opportunity to get a suitor. Very hard to get a free spirited, open minded Kenyan woman ready to put and consider all variables on the table to settle. Ideally, consumed with selfishness and unproductive grandeur. I am at my early 50 now and ready to marry again after raising my children. But it seems I have to go to Kenya to get a woman to marry. Am sorry to our sisters in U.S, us men look at career and resultant money earned as a way to earn a descent living, not a scale to measure a man's worth in life. Us Kenyan men won't negate our cultural and traditional ideals to 3embrace American society lifestyle. That's not going to happen. So our beautiful ladies, understand your Kenyan brothers and work to find common grounds for the relationship and building one. We aren't going to change our Kenyan way of life's culture and traditions, just as other societies like Indians, Asians or Latinos do, and live peacefully, instilling their culture and traditions to their children. Am heading to Kenya to find me a good sister otherwise.
Wow, can you tell deeper truth better than you have laid it naked here? I Used to date this Kenyan ka-dame back in the days when I used to work as basic CNA wiping old people’s pupu! Those were the days I hassled to go the University! But I stayed put!
The ka-dame dumped me because of my dirty job for a muzungu. It surely hurt my feelings but I had to accept the reality part of it! No more some some!
Fifteen years later, I got my Doctor’s degree as a Neurologist and big money begun to flow in. Patience, hard work and prayers work!
I recently got a call from the same ka-dame, now with a kid, telling me the white guy dumped her and now she wanted to come visit me.
Just imagine how I felt about her calling me after a long time - severely bitter that she would even dare reconnect with me again! Life has a way of playing itself out!
Now ka-dame is in her late thirties and no body wants her. The ka-dame wanted us to forget everything that ever happen in those days I was not profitable to her. Surely I had to listen to her long one sided monologue that sounded a committed preacher winning a lost soul for the higher Kingdom!
But, a long boring conversation, I nicely told her - thank you for calling me but I have moved on with my now beautiful life! Now I have several nice ma-dames asking me out! But I will not take the bate!
Here are the facts - many kenyan women do not see the future. They are not willing to patiently wait for the guy wearing “the old teacher” shoes to struggle and make it!
And so I tell the Kenyan men struggling to make in America - please keep doing what you are doing but have a long term goal to have a good profession job and be somebody! Follow your own North Star and listen to the beautiful voices from above!
And when Ciro comes running back - please don’t hesitate to tell her no thank you!
I’m still single and life can’t be any better - I’m living it with everything I ever wanted and even more better ma-dames chasing me around! And yes, I’m playing the hide and seek game to the max! The beautiful ones are not yet born and men never grow old!!
Dave, someday you will have to settle. We all get old. And stop running around.. you may end up needing help yourself.
You just need to look around and we are many here but for some reason no one locate us. Hardworking, can cook, clean etc, etc. But for some reason we are never asked or approached and still l ask that question as to what do men look for. I can parade 10 us single and l will say we are nice but no men says hi to us.
I hear you out. I believe you. Thing is, after going through hell, many men just decide to keep off from serious engagements. They’ll only chase to smash but no more. Also, in the same spirit, some of us, just like some of you women, have discovered other women from other countries are different & often muuuuuch better characterwise
Mlachake so you are saying characterwise we have a problem? But maybe what works and correct me if l am wrong since both of you are of different culture tend to accommodate each other and behave well toward each other but when its comes to us we are charged harshly. For whatever reason l hear some says Kenyan women are okay and those who want to marry other countries do so but for me l wanted one from HOME and we can go back there and retire. I think l settle with the singlehood and l will not whine because l will tell you l never went out looking and for Kenyan men l can't charge them since its not for me to charge.
I have wanted a home girl too but the game playing is just too much for me! So I have started looking elsewhere!
Why do Kenyan women in America say one thing while they mean completely the opposite? I don’t understand that coded talk!
Tell me if you want a hot dog and I will go get it - straight street talking; no speaking in endless parables! I’m too busy to waste valuable time decoding what a woman means!
Also the whining over silly stuff like an 8 year old kid turns me off! Those baby tardrums piss me off; and especially after a whole day of work! I can’t be going home to do endless crisis management of none issues instead of resting my brains!
It's painful to read what you wrote. You don't write well, at all. Please polish your writing skills.
First ask yourself do you know what men look for? Actually do you know what the man you are looking for, is looking for? And what do you have to offer that man? Men are looking for feminity youth fertility cooperativeness submission and may be inspiration. That's your homework. Kevin Samuels can help with your assignments.
Where are the ten of you with the description you highlighted here! I’m looking for one chic below 35 and lady to get pregnant within a month! I need to settle down!
Where are the humble many women - the void ten in your group?
But @Liz, every time I try to talk to a Kenya women in America, she just blows me off with a huge attitude like that of Wangu Wa Makeri!
Don’t even give me a chance to finish my “hello”! Maybe because I’m 6’2” I scare women; don’t know, maybe!?
As a Pilot, I’m always in the air! And when off work, I like to wear loose relaxed outfits to settle my mind!
But most Kenyan women want a man who is always dressed in Charles Njonjo pin stripped suits and Bruno Mali shoes.
That is not my style except when I’m heading to the House of the Lord on Sunday when I dress casually but nice! I think women have to get their game together to connect with good Kenyan men - and yes, there are a lot of good guys out there, but we stay very busy!!
There are few things you need to know about men and life when you as a woman become an adult, I mean 18yo. Men are looking for
These qualities are prime when a woman is in her 20's. At that time you need to date with a purpose to marry (6 mos a man knows if he will marry you, don't date for 2+ years.) Ideally (not always) the best time to snag a marriage material man is When you are in your twenties and definitely below 30; and you have to be a potential wife, not just a female. The marriage ready man is likely to be about 30 to 40. Don't buy into the lie that in your 20's you are gonna go to college and just date. Riding the carousel turns you into a piece, a body collecting female. No man want's that. There is no product that increases in value with use and age. Men will get the best deal they can because they have options, you don't. You have the inevitable wall waiting at 30. Listen to Kevin Smith, better bachelor and strong successful male, whether you like what they say or not.
My mom is single in her mid fifties. Very down to earth, loves God and is full of wisdom. Send me an email (firstname.lastname@example.org)I connect you two. Sorry for being left as a single dad.
"Am heading to Kenya to find me a good sister otherwise."
She comes here, her eyes get opened if you will, and 50/50 chances she ditches your butt since we know US divorce rate, even worse in Belgium. Do your future self a solid one and listen now to Kevin Samuels, Strong successful Men and Better Bachelor.
Do these women really know what in the hell they are talking about in African men? Wow, Really, really, reallyyyyy!!
Who would want to date a Kenyan woman with more manly attitudes than any African man alive? They got worse sucking attitudes than the king of Zamunda!
It is all material things for the material Kenyan woman, and for most African women abroad! Sure, a dude is wearing old tea her shoes to save up money while you want the same dude to buy a new BMW with a lollipop attached to the wheel steering for you be to be sucking it while you drive; you good digger!
So y’all can date and marry those tootsie roll white boys who are going around kissing your ass and holding your damn hands like you have lost your physical and mental balance while wearing some high heels with 15 inches high spikes!
No wonder I’m now dating a gorgeous baby from Montigo Bay, Jamaica! I’m happy and I won’t date a Kenyan women who never think about the future but now and yesterday!!
The problem with Kenyan women in America is they are all looking for a man to use like a tick sucks blood from a cow until the cow drops dead, and then she moves to the next victim!
These women also drink alcohol more than Bob Shinangans like it was 1999! They stay more drunk than that karumaindo chic on River Road , Nairobi.
These Kenyan women got the nerves to talk about Kenyan men? Keep your dirty tuchi to yourself if you think we care!
I won’t marry any Kenyan woman in America! They are all huge snobs with a damn chip on both shoulders, and a double square head!!
Ngahikania ndeda because there is no shortage of other international women in America! No wonder I’m now dating a very beautiful and young Venezuelan who appreciates me, works as hard as I do, shares the domestic bill, and she even bought me a brand new Mercedes 580 SUV.
She is a medical doctor and Very sexy!! And how do you like me now Kenyan sisters! Astera vista baby!
Mathenge, just curiously what is that Mercedes 580 SUV, is this a new 2021 model or what, please enlighten me.
2021 GLS 580 SUV baby! Visit the Benz Dealership near you, and you will find the new GLS bro! Got it!! Any dealership will let you test drive one! The horse power is magnificent It drives like a Cucu BA!! Don’t be jealous baby boy!
@Mathenge we do not need your kind so stay away from Kenyan women. we are not donkeys we are free and independent we can stand on our own . we will marry when and who we want if we choose to . if we want kids. It is so easy to get a child from the man we choose to . Women are smarter than men they calculate. Men just want to sleep with anything in a skirt . Can you stay away from women ? get castrated that way you will not encounter us
Please talk to my damn hand! Which Kenyan women if I may ask you @guest!? I already told you I never come close to them smelly she goats! Get lost. I won’t even talk to you! I have stayed away and will continue that tread! Go figure elsewhere! You ain’t anything I want to even see with my closed eyes!
You are a classic example of the dirty Kenyan women in America! You can marry whoever you wish including that huge male dog in your bedroom and no one cares! Who asked you all you have said here you drunkard!? Now that you want to castrate @mathenge, what are your plans with his balls in your hands? Eat them raw??
Kwenda huko. There is no Vezuelan or great white, latina or anyone dating yoll Kenyan men harping here. Hehehehe!
Watch Kevin Samuel's on YouTube. Men all over the world have the same demands. They are looking for a woman who is
3) fit (good looking)
Most of this women complaining lack all 4.
That is a baby you are looking for,no kenyan woman wants a kenyan man with a fragile ego like a child. There is nobody to baby sit you bruh.
This is very telling. Women think they know what men want. Women are not listening to men. Next thing they know they are hitting 30....33...38 heck 40+ without their hearts desire. Women may control access to s3x but men control access to relationships. For real, go listen to Kevin Samuels.
Kanyaga kubwa kubwa na uyo Kevin Sam wako. You need a woman that loves you and is compatible with you. Otherwise utakulwa pesa uwachwe high and dry by those very young ladies Kevin anawadanganya find someone your age that matches your lifestyle financially na one that loves you for you and not because you're a high value man with six figure salary
This is very simple folks.Kenyan women do not have to marry Kenyan men,and then chastise them.You are free to marry whomever you think is agood match for you.The key her is MATCH. Yes, some Kenyans are ambitious others are not.Some are hard working other are not.
The problem is that, many Kenyans are mismatched,or mismatching themselves. You will find couples getting married in the USA,where as the same couples under similar circumstances would not get married if they were in Kenya.
Ofcourse, culturally imposed values also play abig role.Most Kenyan men still expect awoman after along days work not to order apizza,chinese or indian food but to cook ugali,chapati,nyamachoma...etc.Foods that take time,while he is relaxed watching TV,and imbibing adult bevarage-generally.
Bottom line, no relationship can survive regardless of nationality if one party feels deprived,overworked, unappreciated,and not respected.Notice that I did not include love in the calculus.See,if someone, respects, cares, watches your back,pays attention to you,they are there when you need help,or ashoulder to lean on,how can you not LOVE them?
And the battle of the sexes continues.Probably they will never be avictor.Improved offensive and defensive armaments of massive destruction are amassing on both sides.Reinforcement from, America,Nigeria, Britain, spain is not necessary at this point.Dont throw in the towel yet.I suggest a truce.Where is Solomon when you need him?
"See,if someone, respects, cares, watches your back,pays attention to you,they are there when you need help,or ashoulder to lean on,how can you not LOVE them?"
All the Kenya woman in America wants is money, and more money regardless of the kind of j.o.b. the guy is doing!
These women have become seriously high maintenance and have no sense of saving a fine fir the future! No sane Kenyan man wants a Kenyan woman in America!
There are so many other good and beautiful women to chose from in this pool of dating - guys have you dated those slick Russian and Ukreinian sexy babes? Oh boy, they love real dark chocolate boys from Kenya!
Secondly, the Kenya woman in America has lost the sense of the family unit! She just want to hung out in corner bars consuming gallons and litters of the America Coors beer! No wonder no man wants to have anything to do with these whores!
Kenya men abroad do not like baby tads offered by Kenyan women abroad! I personally won’t date a Kenyan women in America! Why - the ocean is full of more beautiful fish from all over the world! Men want newness and a trouble free relationship!
I can’t date a Kenyan woman who salivates at the sight of a dollar Bill! Oh yes sisters keep you attitudes way up you leave behind until you start getting too old and panicking! We men never get too old to score elsewhere!
@Sonie Kendi, ignorance is very dangerous."East African women .....because our black American women are rowdy,uncouth...their men" Have you taken the time to learn what they have gone through for 400 years in their land of captivity? You are unable to see them as your brothers and sisters because you do not know your own history and you do not know their history either. For 400 years, their kids die on the streets of America because the tale light of their car was broken; because their kids were eating skeetles (Trevon Martin); because they were jogging on the street (Armad Aubrey) because their son had a fake dollar bill (George Floyd). All those American women you are talking about are mothers,sisters,aunts to all these and many others who have died over 400 years.
After 400 years of separation, its time for all of us to come together, understand East African women are not better than black American women.We have experienced Imperialism, Colonialism, Neo colonialism. We need to come together, mother and child (Afrcans and Black Americans)to reconnect and be a family again.
As for our men,both black Americans and Africans ,we love them and if you have nothing good to say about them,do not say anything!!
This article may be as old as those ladies who are in their 40s single and dry for a Kenyan man liking. What year was the last time 1 dollar at kshs 85? 2016? 2015?
The grind never stops! Welcome to the world of milk and honey. Let’s face it, freedom is never free, our Kenyan sinyoritas came to this land and ran with liberal innuendos. I have my rights too, it’s my money, I need some me time. On the other hand, a man found himself lost in this entanglement. He bore offsprings with this lady, if she lives, I have to part with a pay check, now you have to be there and stick it out for kids sake. Till one of you is fade up and bounces. I know couples who married for love and majuu shenanigans has nothing on them. Juala tafuteni, let’s empower each other. I know hardworking sister and brothers in diaspora and I know some with zero ambition.
Every man is different & every man can change if they are willing to . I know my opinion I think I’ll keep it to myself with this one haha . This was so poorly wrote.
Ha ha so predictable!Comments rolling up in here, I knew the raw anger and hate was going to rear its ugliness and not disappointed. Just here for reading hating comments, with all these safi kama pamba Kenyan dudes and their scenarios
Hope these women are speaking on their own behalf and the men they have encountered. The Kenyan men described above are not a representative of all Kenyan men. Maybe the above women should look in the mirror and see the logs in their eyes before trying to pry away the splinters in men's eyes. Misery loves company and these notion of 'tuko wengi' is why they are ending up alone, single or single mothers. Relationships and marriage require compromise among many other factors. Ukija huku diaspora, earn a few dollars and forget relationships basics you will assume all Kenyan men are dogs, but dogs are loyal as fuck if you treat them right and vice versa. Endeleeni kuteta while others are happily settling down. Bure kabisa.
There are so much in every societal culture. Americans amongst the worlds communities have their own culture. All of us experience culture shock when we travel out of our locality to foreign lands. Most times, it could be devastatingly untenable to rush and consume all that are in other people’s cultures.
For example many women coming to America from Kenya, after a few stays have been heard with this indignation “ this is America”. Without doubt I believe all parties know this to be America. But why the reminder? It’s the culture shock that is absorbed wrongly too quickly. Such are red flags of the beginning of the end of a relationship.
Other societies like Indian, Arabian and the Asian communities and even to some extent the Latino tend to approach other’s culture with caution. In spite of culture shock and every other common family issues, they are found to have high resilience when it come to degrading their own cultures. This perhaps explains part of why most of their families and values are intact.
Sadly for the same reasons ( this is America) our women view the culture on which they were raised on as primitive and uncivilized. They literally try to be more American than the Americans themselves. Oh boy we can remain civilized and decent at the same time harboring our cultures.
Other factors that put the families adrift is separation of collective responsibility. And especially monetary. Most women start having “ my money syndrome “. This selflessness will definitely tear the family apart.
If you went into rich -educated or not - American homes you are bound to find the wife is still the manager of the house. She still cooks and serves food. I understand that it may be difficult with our hustler homesteads where the wife could be the one working more hours than the husband. It’s common sense in this case for a husband to come to the aid. After all we are partners and as much we should keep our cultures while on the same token adjust to realities of the time.
So if you’re single today, don’t beat yourself up. You could be a good person. Continue being good. Your suitor is coming. And if you see he didn’t come yet, continue being happy. For those others, and everyone be Kenyan inside and American.outside.
There is a lot to unpack here. I will take issue with calling African American women uncouth. These women are on the streets fighting for your rights.
The predictable nature of Kenyan women always attacking Kenyan men is getting old. News flash we don’t want you either!
As far as those Kenyan women who chooses other people more than their own, they are motivated by their own perspectives. They have this mentality that something that is not Kenyan is better. It will be wild to think that other husbands who are not Kenyans are a better breed. Wrong. The most unique thing that exist and separates humans is language and food. All other aspects are mostly universal.. No special race in humans. They walk upright and equally with their same common senses.
Some women do it for selfish interests. With a husband from different lands, these group of women are easily able to keep their pocket books for themselves with the excuse being helping her family back home. If we assume that this was a Kenyan man, there would probably be a combined pocket book.
In the end, let’s respect our honest women who out of genuine individual love picks a partner from other regions and not because he is not Kenyan.
Pendo Langu, at 50,you are an ancestor. Don't come here to spoil our sisters with your $$ Benjamins. You should have come earlier when you had some vigour and aren't on viagra. Make peace with African American women and African women in America
As an ancestral type, I have accumulated some $$$. The wisdom thing is a work in progress. Too often when I visit, despite my attempt at blending, something about me screams "this man needs to be scammed" from business proposals to straight cash requests. I would just tell Pendo Langu to watch his money wherever he lives. Kenyan men from the diaspora have had their lives ended in Kenya over money and property (mburoti). I assume that if he has lived here 20-30 years, savvy scammers can spot it. His trust will lead to bad outcomes.
I know only a tiny portion of Kenyan men in the US so I can't generalize. The ones I do know are mostly in long term marriages, some to Kenyans others to Americans of all stripes. They are hard working and taking care of family. Thing one is not blaming others for your shortcomings but looking in the mirror. If the men you meet seem to fit a pattern, there is a good chance that is a reflection of who you are. More likely than not, in your 20s you played games and the men moved on. Now those same men have moved on and wouldn't look at you so you are stuck trying to attract men who are younger and have different needs. Good luck with that. Generalizing about Black American women, who since 1619 have blazed a path that lets you immigrate and thrive here is idiotic. You are just buying into and regurgitating a white narrative. When a cop runs into your child, they don't distinguish immigrant from native. To white nationalists you are the lowest of the low in desirability.
Calling names our Africa American sisters is serious and primitive. I've met sweet nice submissive sisters in church and out of church. This complaining Kenya woman doesn't see the whole picture. I know one lady who left her man after bringing her mother here but a few weeks later she regretted because she saw importance of a husband in the house paying most bills and the man she was cheating with was a truck driver with a wife. This prostitution must stop. Money isn't everything. There's blessings in marriage you can't buy. Being super liberal doesn't pay. Kenyan woman wants to eat from both sides of her mouth. She wants a submissive masculine man who pays all bills. Oxymoron.
Spirits of Jezebel on overtime and overthrow. You can't have what you don't honor and respect. Spirits or likes attract. If you met the wrong men it is because of what is in you that is wrong. African woman is the only one that will change her culture wherever she goes. Asian, Hispanic and Arab culture are more conservative and family oriented. Be the change you want to see.
@Builder, right on! I brought mine from chag's but now she's so-Americanized. Her work if following youtube "so-called prophets" and acting all holly out there but in the house she's a devil. I myself cannot wait for my kids to finish college and get out of this America. If refusing to be treated like crap and looked down on makes an African man weak and non-ambitious, then so be it but our African women are total failures. But America gives them so much power making a African man an endangered species.
Mwakilishi she will regret later. A woman who doesn't listen to her man will go ahead and listen to a liar just like Eve did with the serpent. It is self deception on steroids. Man is the high priest of the house all time. It is sad govt treats man in the house as an enemy and want him out so the lady can access aid.
Sorry about your situation. Life is too short for that shyte. While she is on UT get on there yourself and check out Strong Successful Male, Better Bachelor, Kevin Samuels. Line your ducks - separate bank, collect evidence of any shennanigans, ill treatment etc. Consult D.Lawyers, when the right time comes boom strike and dump her. Clean cut, no child support, alimony nothing. No wonder Men Going Their Own Way is growing like wild fire. Get a dog, Date and dump or should I say pump and dump. Good luck!
Wow! Isn't it so amazing that these women who "NOW" so happen to be misses know it all that majority of them were sponsored to come to America by their now "non-ambitious" husbands. These are the same women who leads worships and prayers in the churches. I'm a woman but I MUST say with all due respect that most women are evil and VERY selfish. They married their now so-called "non-ambitious" spouses because of other reasons i.e. get papers, schooling just to name a few. Most of now have becoming so addicted to following the "so-called prophets youtubers". And if their husbands refuses to join those cults, then that makes the husbands "non-compliant" and "non-religious". Women! Stop treating our African brothers like toys in your homes. African men are not domestics pets that you can keep around the house to toss around as needed. African men grew-up interacting with each other and that's how they build each others masculinity. I know you will disagree with me though back in your mind you know I'm right. Just stop the fakeness and remember that you're nothing without your husbands supports. But now that you have because LVN's, RN Nurses and NP's you're untouchable. But all I can say is that God is watching.
First off, shame on your inferiority complexes as shown by your racist bias on African Americans. As a Kenyan man, let me state that Kenyan women here in the states are just plain hideous. They have no real hobbies and most look years older than their actual age. Am shocked how beautiful Kenyan women are when I visit home. They are among the best and I have travelled the world extensively. Personally am attracted to African American women. And the only reason she picks on them is that they are clearly more attractive and they say it like it is. Of course no one is perfect. Dear Kenyan women in the states, you are invisible. Your degrees and big cars mean nothing here. I will agree though that many Kenyan are stuck in that ‘buloti’ mentality.
Woooiii John... surely "hey have no real hobbies and most look years older than their actual age. I love to travel and l have done so extensively and No l do not look that old though l did hit 50. I do have a degrees BUT NO big car BUT i say it like it is and you know and l think African men do not like that. I always thought l will marry my kenyan men cook ngima, githeri, mukimo but wapi.... Year run and NO man and single as l can be. Happy and not complaining because the bible says " I be hunted and not for me to go hunting as that will be reversing God rule. Man was given dominion NOT woman, hellooo. Anyway enough on this topic, it all good.
You don't have to hunt but do go to places where the men are, do not limit yourself to Kenyan men and above all stay positive and keep hope alive. You won't find men staying at home. Ngai akurathime
Mundumugo… I think l did limit myself to Kenyan men because that was my preference so we can grow old together in Kenya eating mukimo, ngima,thamaki etc etc... l think l made peace with the whole and you know God fill in that gap for them who trust HIM and so l do have fun with my singlehood watching Kenyan comedy.
Can you kindly post your photo here for a closer look!? I’m 37 and still looking! I’m just a worker-Holic!! A professional careerist, for that matter! Well established! Need a baby or two🎂!! Will provide a comfortable living!
Rhoda Adera, totally disagree with the sentiment It depends on the visa one is granted. Save for those who immigrate here on the Green Card, many Kenyans come here as students or visitors. Without proper documentation, you cannot work and without work, finding a stable relationship is nearly impossible". Some of us came with that Student visa and like l always tell people nothing changes, the rules were there when we came in the 90s. We were just defiant and got jobs tena good ones. Student were deported back then and so when l hear this things and been spoken by someone who has not done their homework well l wonder which part they are and do they have the full knowledge to speak on the subject. On Kenyan men it’s their choice but know there are some making it and doing well and some of us who are single because l am single l can't tell you why but l can tell you l do not go looking for men because that the man responsibility to hunt me ‘He who find a Good wife" that man and it’s in the bible so that their own problem but l decided to live my life and to be happy and have no time to mourn that l do not have a man and l am in my 50s looking HOT and young too hallelujah Amen to that. I trace the problem with us African, try to get anything done in Kenya and come back and update us and then you know we us a people and a generation have a problem. This issue is accross board its not only for Kenyan Men and everyone White, blacks, yellow, Asians. Have you studied the cases of Japan and singlehood hellooooo. Ya'all STOP IT PERIOD!!!
Kenyan women here in the states are VERY busy chasing almighty $$$ and they lay blames and their shortcomings to their husband -poor brothers. They also don't take care of themselves like African Americans sisters do. Lakini Jealousy itawaua.
Put it like this - the women here play too many games hoping to be chased to the horizons of the world! But for a professional like me, I really don’t have time chasing skirts! As a scientist, I work long hours doing research! So I am left with little time to chase chics until roosters came home to rest! I do not play games; I speak precisely - like it or not!
Why interview only women? I’m a man and successful, USC.... college educated. I would take lots of convincing to date a Kenyan woman. They need to style up. Doesn’t matter how a man dresses as long as he brings home the bacon.
@komen - the material Kenyan women living overseas are very myopic in their view of life! The man’s dress code is their determining factor!
I have a friend who is in the trucking business. He has eight 18 wheeler trucks attached to UPS for the long haul trucking.
He gets paid big and he is doing very well financially! But the guy dresses poorly and works all the time! Anyone who doesn’t know what he does won’t give him the light of day!
It’s quite petty for a woman to just judge a man by the dress code alone!
One sided story, most Kenyan women in US don't care if the Kenyan man has it going on for himself or not. The women are attracted to the American way of living hence take advantage of the system to oppress the Kenyan man. Kenyan men marry Tanzanian ladies like I did coz they still have African values in them.
Spaceforce. West Africa, TZ UG and Central Africa ladies still have culture. Some Kenya ladies are empty heads on steroids. They take culture 4 primitivity and adopt oppression, liberalism, feminism and witchcraft as their new culture.
You can get an angel for a perfect husband my dear.Get one nigga and mold him,shape him the way you want.Hata wa Nigeria wale mnapenda bado wana shida zao
Well well well......I have an African American wife, highly educated, cooks, cleans, very respectful. No Udaku!! What else can man ask for?
I would say not all ladies are bad as mentioned here. There are very humble,kind, hardworking and God fearing ladies out there unfortunately they don't get Mr right. Whoever they get end up hurting them and leaving them broken in to pieces.
Both Kenyan women and men are complaining alike here! There are many good men and women living abroad! So why complain? Just look fir a perfect match ( several exist both sexes), but be honest!
I’m still looking but can’t find because of my busy schedule! Working too much and I also need some rest when off work!
Can we all get a long!?
The only sane comment here! Both sides are whining here based on a comment from 2 women, there are so many GREAT Kenyan men and women living abroad and looking too but the kind of comments in here for anyone looking for a Kenyan man or woman is such a put off.
It all boils down to having understanding of others, respecting their space, and not being judgmental!
Women sometimes cause all their issues and then expect men to magically solve those nasties! And yes, most women gossip too much to even give room for a relationship to grow - stop the hue gal talk when you are betting a man.
Kenyan men are very cool, kind, corrected, and generous until you start stepping on their too. Then you get nerveless hard and the rest is a good story if you live to tell it!
The US has the 3rd highest divorce rate in the world.
Many factors affect relationships including navigating new environments.US has challenges like any other place that can affect relationships.
Some groups in US have 30% marriage rates; some 39% some 48%;Asians highest at roughly 60%.125million adults are single in america and 40million adults are living alone.
It is a new dynamic for everyone not just Kenyans(before 1960 80% of US households were headed by 2 parent married couples;not anymore).
There are Kenyans with successful relationships and those with challenges just like in Kenya(only 100,000 kenyans in US almost 50million Kenyans in Kenya).
Kenyans are not monolithic; Kenya is a mutlicultural, multireligious, multiwealth,multieducation,multiple- relationship society with people having varied experiences.
STOP THE STEREOTYPING!!